Thursday, January 9, 2014

Why The Judicial System/Government Is Failing Abused Children (Part 4)

This is Part 4.

It was pressed on my spirit (New Year's Day) to do a post on this topic. This is dear to my heart and it's my prayer after you read this, you will be moved to action. I now share my thoughts (intermingled with a fellow advocate or two) as to why the judicial system/government is failing abused children.

Article 2 (this one focuses on suicide – which the rate for children is increasing):

Article 3:

Article 4:

When I think about the articles above, only one can shake their head. Not only do I shake my head, but I also cry for the children who are neglected, abandoned and left for dead (whether physically, mentally or spiritually). As I am an abuse survivor, I believe there should be justice as well as mercy. I’ll explain as I go.

The first article about the mother cutting off her abuser’s genitals, I understand her frustration (not justifying her actions), but at the same time, she needed to know if what she believed was really true. It’s sad that the justice system is more than willing to punish anyone who takes the law into their hands, but at the same time, they will turn around and let the abuser to run rampant. It’s not all the justice system’s fault, a lot of the blame resides in the family structure.

The second article sends chills down my back. To see children so young die for whatever reason is an adult’s worst nightmare. What makes this story so chilling is this: the mother and aunt were home when the girls hung themselves. I mention my thoughts on that in the final paragraph.

The third article should make everybody cringe. A mother (as you see in the photo cheesing away) sexually abuses her children. We spend so much time focusing on the abuser and not caring for those who can’t defend themselves. And here’s the sad part of this article: she’s being held on 2 million dollars bond on the charges of sexual abuse of a child under 12 years old and child neglect. No offense: if it had been someone of color, the abuser would be immediately in jail on a life sentence (or even worse, if an abused child tries to protect him/herself, they would end up in jail and the abuser gets a slap on the wrist). And we wonder why we are in the shape we’re in.

The fourth article takes place in a different country, but it actually angers me to the core. Now this is really destroy something beautiful that God created, virginity and purity! For a mother to have children and sell them to sexual predators is a heinous crime. The infamous question I have to ask is this: are the children being prayed for, in counseling? Their innocence was robbed! As for the mother, who was being extremely selfish and devilish to rob these girls of their virginity for money, she needs mercy (because I have a gut feeling she was molested) and justice for she knew of the crime she did! Rhonda Walker (author of Healing The Rage Within says this): This is sad and I feel for the young girls. What goes through a mothers head to make the decision to prostitute her daughters? I mean her daughters are in her image...why does she hate herself so much and why does she hate her daughters? We know hurt people hurt people so I wonder if this was done to her. I wonder if this is her norm? I Hope and pray her daughters get the help they need and for the ones missing, I pray they are safe.

It’s like the judicial system/government want these children to die. In fact, the government should go on and say, since we don’t like what God has ordained (the family structure), let’s break down the family by first and foremost strip the child from the family and then we will do as we did in the Bible days, kill children at will. Pharaoh wanted Hebrew boys under 2 to be killed and Herod wanted babies under 2 to be killed.

I ask this question in my fictional memoir Deaf, Dumb, Blind & Stupid: “And WHY, isn’t anything done to the parent or the abuser? How do we rectify this problem? Parents, you are to love and protect your children. Once you become a parent, it is no longer about what is convenient for YOU... you are now charged with caring for the life of your child until that child is able to care for him or herself. And one never stops being a parent, even until old age. So, what do we do? Say to the abused, “the Lord says to forgive and get over it?” That’s not an easy fix for someone who has suffered under the hands of the enemy who’s trying to kill them. To add insult to injury, no charges are brought up against the abusers who are in some cases even protected by other adults – and cursed is the victim. I’m not saying the victim should go on living life constantly as the victim, but in the midst of the abuse, why curse the victim?”


  1. I agree. We have our focus all wrong. As survivors do their best to live a meaningful life society expects the effects of abuse to just go away. The religious will quickly admit that sexual abuse is one of the worst forms of sin. But when it has life destroying effects on the victims they respond like, "what is the big deal?" It is my belief that the worst sins are considered the worst by God because of the level of damage they do. To be like Christ we need to care for and love the abused, to validate them and help them heal. If we wont, who will?

  2. The sad thing is that every act as an effect. As our country's legal acts let the abuser get away with abuse over and over again... As our society's social acts effectively isolate, ostracize, and criticize the victims... As this pattern repeats over and over, year after year, we have the results of abuse running rampant and unaddressed mental illness crippling masses. Justice is needed for the abusers. Christ like love is needed for the survivors. I wonder how many of our social ills can be solved by just doing these two things.

    1. Jean Marie: What you just mentioned above is a perfect example of hypocrisy of the faith community. We say that sexual abuse is a heinous sin, but we treat those victimized like they're the scum of the earth. And yes, this is in the faith community.

      One thing I heard almost 20 years ago fits in this case: justice delayed is justice denied. If an abused child is not given justice for the crime done (or the love they so need), as I mentioned in DDBS (that's Deaf, Dumb, Blind & Stupid for short), they will either take their lives or they will become sadistic.

      Great observations!

  3. This really hit home! "If an abused child is not given justice for the crime done (or the love they so need)," If we are going to imagine a better world, I would like to imagine one where the abused child gets both justice and love. Great point!

    1. I would like to imagine a world where there will be no hurt, no tears, etc. (Revelation 21), and it will come in the future. I know in this world, we will have tribulation. And sadly, innocent people will suffer under the hands of the guilty (dating back to Cain & Abel). I'm so glad Jean that you caught my post "My Voice (As A Survivor) Is A Powerful Weapon." This is why people like us need to keep speaking. :)