This blogpost was just dropped in my spirit. You know, as humans, we have the propensity to blame people for things that we did wrong and never accept responsibility. Now let me qualify a screw-up for this blogpost. A screw-up is where you actually do something knowing full well that you should not be involved. I’m not talking about blindsides (or things you eventually find out later on due to deception in the other person).
I’m going to use relationships as an example for this blogpost. About two weeks ago, someone was sharing with me about their frustration with relationships and as a result their faith in men and with God is hanging in the balance. In fact, their quote to me was this, “I tried to a relationship my way, and it didn’t work; I tried to do a relationship God’s way, and it didn’t work.” May I stop the car Fred Flintstone style? You tried it God’s way and it didn’t work? First and foremost, God never makes mistakes and to add to that, He can’t lie. The beauty of God is free will. Now, it’s sad that legalism is so bad that people either feel condemned or those who are grieving over their screw-ups to the point that listening to God in certain areas is hindered.
I said that God doesn’t make mistakes and He can’t lie. Ok, I was looking up some scriptures to a book that I finished reading a few days ago, and one scripture spoke to me clearly.
2 Corinthians 6:14-15 from the Message Bible says “Don’t become partners with those who reject God. How can you make a partnership out of right and wrong? That’s not partnership; that’s war. Is light best friends with dark? Does Christ go strolling with the Devil? Do trust and mistrust hold hands?”
There are so many Christians who know full well that the person that they are going to marry rejects God or isn’t even thinking about God. Again, I’m not referring to those who find out that the person they married was a counterfeit after the vows were taken. It breaks my heart to hear people blame God when people knew they were unequally yoked from the start and the marriage goes south. Do I believe God would have you marry an unbeliever? No! You’re part of a family (the family of Christ).
Let’s talk more about unequally yoked (that’s how it’s stated in the King James version and New King James Version). It’s not just believers yoking with unbelievers. It can be extended further to areas of healing (one agrees with divine healing and the other doesn’t), giving, and many other things that I didn’t mention.
So what am I saying here? God watches over His Word to perform it. He wants us to walk in the fullness of Him to have the abundant life that He’s promised us. Why do we blame God for our screw-ups? Because we think that God is going to protect us in every area of our lives. He will protect us and is constantly protecting us; however, because He loves us so much, He has given us free will. Think about it, He told Adam that he can eat from every tree except one. Adam made the choice and ate and then said, God, the woman You gave me (was the problem). That’s where the blaming God started. Another reason we blame God is because we don’t really want to reap the consequences of our mistakes. I don’t know about you, I used to be disciplined a lot, and I hated when my punishments were delayed. If you add the anxiety I had during childhood due to Aspergers, it was torture. I was like, let’s this discipline over with. The beauty of God is that 1 John 1:9 says if we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us! Don’t give a care about what others say and do – many will want you to feel worse than you what you currently feel, that’s their pride and a screw-up they need to confess. Take ownership of your faults, learn from them ad then launch onto what God has planned for you. You may think you’re out for the count because of your screw-up, and the devil is going to do all he can to make you think you’re out for the count because of your screw-up, but God hasn’t counted you out! He never counts anyone out.
Before I close, I do want to address this point. If you were blindsided, deceived in the realm of relationships, you are innocent and God is going to deal with that deceiver. Now, my prayer is that you gained a valuable lesson on discernment, and now your prayer life has taken on a new meaning, and that you are allowing God to heal every wound that you have (physical, mental, spiritual, emotional and financial). Don’t be afraid to put your life on the altar. You matter to Him, but it’s my prayer that we take responsibility for the things that we know we did that are contrary to God’s standard and confess it to Him. You can’t hide it from Him; He already knows you’re struggling with it on your own and He knows it’s wearing you down. He wants it so you can be free to live!
The Mayne Man