Rejected & Offended

Last weekend, I was listening to a lesson entitled Overcoming Offenses, and it really made me think about some things, one being how we don’t confront those who actually offend us. But then there are times that people are offended when you actually don’t do anything wrong (a great example is that you have changed the course for your life and others don’t agree with it – as a result, they reject you and they’re offended because you decided to do something different with your life). Now I’d like to use the story of Jesus when He was in his hometown – this is after He grew up and was baptized into His ministry. So let’s just look at Mark 6:1-3 (and then we’ll talk a little bit more after):

Then He went out from there and came to His own country, and His disciples followed Him. And when the Sabbath had come, He began to teach in the synagogue. And many hearing Him were astonished, saying, “Where did this Man get these things? And what wisdom is this which is given to Him, that such mighty works are performed by His hands! Is this not the carpenter, the Son of Mary, and brother of James, Joses, Judas, and Simon? And are not His sisters here with us?” So they were offended at Him.

How many of you have ever experienced this (where people reject you and become offended because you’ve changed – or you’re not like you used to be when you were little)? I’ll use a little bit of my life. When I decided to follow Christ, my family was like, “you used to do this when you were little.” I laugh when I think about it because you have probably heard the phrase, “you never grow up to your parents.” Friends are no different (now this isn’t my life), they would say something, “you’re a sellout, I remember when you used to run around chasing after every girl, and you had a girl on your arms every time I see you. You used to smoke and drink on the corner, but you call yourself changed your ways.”

Now watch this, as we look at verses 4-6.

But Jesus said to them, “A prophet is not without honor except in his own country, among his own relatives, and in his own house.” Now He could do no mighty work there, except that He laid His hands on a few sick people and healed them. And He marveled because of their unbelief. Then He went about the villages in a circuit, teaching.

What caused the people’s rejection of Jesus and them being offended at Him was because of first their unbelief. And second, they were plagued with that familiar spirit. A familiar spirit is when you’ve been around a person so long, the moment they changed, you don’t like it, and as a result, you reject that person (and are offended because they changed). It’s been said, if you become too familiar with someone, there’s a strong change that you’ll abuse him or her.

If you have ever been rejected and offended because you’ve changed and have decided to make a difference in this world (and going with Christ), don’t let people box you in to other people’s circle. Let them stay offended at you, and let them reject you. God has so much that He wants to do with you (and like Jesus, you may have to leave your hometown because they won’t believe it). Granted, those are the people that would say something like this “I’ll believe it when I see it.” Or they’ll say “he’ll be back to his old ways (or she’ll be back to her old ways), just watch. I’ll entice them back to their old ways.” My advice to that, get as far away from them as you can.

I pray this encourages you if this applies to you.

Blessings.

The Mayne Man

How We Act When We're Offended

On my way to work this morning, my spirit was so full and/or heavy. With that, I need to empty it because my life is to be poured out. God was showing me how we act when we're offended. Eight scenarios appeared to me and they capture the essence of how we act when we're offended.

1. Some people will be offended by what you say & do, but will overlook it if they are able to use you for their self-seeking purpose.

2. There will be those who will be offended by you & they will get their friends and your friends to betray you (because of pride, maintain their status quo). 

3. Many people will be offended but they won't vocalize it until you get real close to their face with what offends them.

As I'm typing this, The Lord dropped this. You get offended when others are going through, but expect others to drop what they're doing to cater to you when you're going through. Because you're offended, you don't bother to pray. This is nothing more than a Pharisee attitude. 

4. Just because you have a certain elite group doesn't mean that everybody has your best interest at heart (Judas Iscariot was part of an elite group and He turned on the Leader because he was offended).

5. We run quickly to the next biggest event (because a man/woman is in our area) than we do the Word of God. And we will take offense if we point out an action that man/woman does is a sin against the Bible. We will really take offense if we call out his or her teaching (even if he or she says we are our own god).

Back to point 4. There are modern-day Judas' around. They stay silent until you say something that offends their personal agenda. Once you say something, they come out of nowhere and unleash every demonic spirit within them. Now, I'm not saying they are demonic, just pointing out the action.

6. We love Jesus though He came to bring division (offense), but we hate our brother/sister because they offended us over something so minor.

7. When a believer says something you don't like, you take offense! But if someone with a title says the same thing the believer said, you welcome it with open arms.

8. Now watch people take offense to this one: God does not base your status in heaven based on your earthly title!

The Mayne Man ... dropping the mic!

Are You Seeking Acceptance From Man or God?

I was asked by a dear friend of mine to share this with you all. I initially shared it with my inner circle when  God spoke this to my heart (around 8:30am on 10/5/13). So, here it goes.

God just revealed something to me that hit home. All of my life, I longed to be accepted. I tried getting it from my family (I got it as long as it fit their mode of operation), I tried getting it through my gifts (some would backfire). Today, I find that as long as I am accepted by Jesus is all that I need acceptance from.

For my calling (and for others with a calling this serious), rejection is expected and many sufferings will be in order. Sadly, many people don't want to bear burdens because of pride. And the sleeping church will league with those with pride issues. We have problems and don't want to share burdens. We don't share because we will face ridicule from prideful people (causing us to feel more condemned). We don't share because we'll receive a deaf ear. Apparently, we're to only need God; however, we do have to listen to their problems. Another reason we don't share is because the same people who want us to open up will be the same ones to make a spectacle out of us and to boost their righteousness over us.

Final revelation: many people will say we have to ask the wrong doer to forgive us when we were abused, neglected, almost to make us feel that we caused it. Of course, this should sound absurd, but we still inflict this on people who need a touch from God. Yes, Jesus took on things He didn't do for our sake, but we're not Jesus. Granted, I got in trouble growing up for things I didn't even do (it was all blamed on me). One thing that comes to mind is the time when one of my relatives who lived with me stole money from the money collected from my cookie sales that people ordered. It has taught me now to be very ethical with how I conduct business with others. So finding acceptance from my family was more difficult. Again, I know now that acceptance only comes from God alone. The world will view us as failures and will want us to bow down to it's acceptance.

So what is the underlying message to this: each person must look to Jesus for acceptance and to determine who you share your most intimate issues with. Not everyone who says that are for you ARE (even in the church world). As Jesus pulled away, sometimes we must do the same thing. People will want to take offense before coming to you to resolve the offense (or they'll tell you they were offended and write you off because they are holier than you). As brothers/sisters, we can't afford to live ourselves to the point that we throw fellow brothers/sisters to the wolves (as open prey to the devil). If God has called someone to something important which requires rejection and suffering, prayer & intercession is necessary (not writing them off). And for us to side with people like that is saying, I agree with writing them off. We all have our quirks, but we should always see the best in people (and not league with the devil by seeing the worst in them). If we can say death and life are in the power of the tongue, we must be truthful at all costs, but discern where a person is in their lives. It's not a one size fits all.

Blessings:

The Mayne Man

The Untouchables of the American Church

Prelude: before you read this post, I want to inform you that I agree with this 150%. This was written by my editor & fellow author Shantae Charles. I remember her telling me a month ago she was planning to write this, and I was waiting for it. She released this on her blog page last week and it was fire! I'm with her when she says, "if you can't tell it, let me tell it!" Most of you know, that's how I am (especially if you went to FAMU with me between 1998 - 2001). With that said, you will probably get offended by this, but I'd advise you to pray about what you''ve just read.   

 

        As I begin this blog, I want to make it clear: the Pastoral calling, and indeed the calling to 5-fold ministry (Eph 4:11-14) is one of the most daunting and rewarding calls one can recieve from God. As a minister who is called to 5-fold ministry, I count it an honor that God counted me worthy putting me into ministry. I am also blessed to have been discipled and trained under pastoral leadership both past and present that has been full of integrity and full of the Holy Spirit's empowerment. I know that many people complain about their church or Pastors, but this is NOT a complaint. I hope to encourage the 5-fold ministry while at the same time provoke my fellow brothers and sisters in Christ to good works and greater relationship with Jesus Christ.

         Jesus said that those who are not saved, are already condemned. He came to provide good news, news of salvation and deliverance, news of healing and forgiveness. Once we have recieved that message, and been grafted in to the Body of Christ, the fold of God, through justification, we emark on a lifelong journey with God in fellowship, in discipleship, in community with other believers, and along the way, we mess up. We screw up royally. We confess, we repent, we ask for God's forgiveness, and faithfully God provides it (I John 1:9).

But, what happens to us when we no longer want to hear the message of the cross? When our walk becomes comfortable and we take a laissez-faire, "let it be" approach to sin? What happens when church becomes just another thing "to do" instead of another opportunity "to change", to be renewed in the spirit of our mind, to understand what it means to put on Christ and not fulfill the desires of the flesh/carnal man?

Well, we come upon what I call The Untouchables: things that many pastors are inceasingly having a hard time addressing over the pulpit or have stopped addressing altogether for fear of losing membership, social or political reprisals (losing a pastorate), economic reprisals (decrease in tithe and offering to support church ministry), and as our laws becoming increasingly "anti-Christian", time in jail. Though there are many more, here are 8 of what I call The Untouchables of the American Church and the attitudes that go along with them.

1. "Don't preach to me about music."

"Yes, I will sell my soul for a Jay-Z, Beyonce, etc. concert ticket, and don't expect me to show up for service if the concert is on the same night as Bible Study...So what if their lyrics mock/deny Christ, and make fun of all that is good, glorifies sex outside of marriage, hustling, drugs, gang violence...the beat is thumping, you can't deny that.

2. "Don't interfere with my love/Sex life."

"So what if I want to be with more than one partner? That wait until marriage idea is archaic. Besides we both agreed to this open marriage...its what's in right now. You've got to try the relationship out first before you settle down with one person, right?"

3. "Don't preach to me about "rights to life."

"Its my body and I can do what I want with it...despite the fact that most abortions are not occuring because the mother's life is in danger, or because of incest or sexual abuse...so what? If I want to use abortion like its birth control, who are you to tell me what to do?"

4. "Don't tell me homosexuality is a sin."

"Look, you just need to get over this, okay? People have been doing this for centuries and its not going to stop. Besides, my Mom, BFF, Uncle, Grandpa, and favorite singers are gay and they're nice to me, so, what's the big deal? You should be able to be with who you want to, right?"

5. "Don't tell me my political views are wrong."

"My president is black, and that's all that matters to me, and if you say another word, I'll shut your mouth for you...besides, faith shouldn't play a role in how you vote and what bills you support, right?"

6. "Don't tell me my appetite is out of control."

"Look, you're not Richard Simmons, so don't even try to tell me what to eat...so what my blood pressure is a little high, and I'm ignoring all the medical advice I have recieved from medical professionals...I'm going to eat, drink, and be merry. End of discussion."

7. "Don't preach to me about my social life."

"You're on thin ice,now. I've sacrificed to join this organization, I've given my time, money, blood, sweat, and tears, I've got too much invested and I'm not giving it up...besides, if you just give me some time, I know I can win them over."

8. "Don't preach about my vices.(Drinking, Obscene Language, Gambling, Smoking)"

"I know, I know, they're bad for me, but everything in moderation, right? My habits aren't really hurting anybody, as long as I only socially drink, and I don't smoke around my kids...so what if I fly off the handle? Everybody gets angry and has an off day, right? Oh, and if I hit the jackpot, I fully intend to donate to the church, okay? Just, leave me alone! I'm only human."

The above attitudes may surprise you, but what surprises me the most is that these attitudes are reflected by Believers in conversation and demonstration. When you have attitudes like this, it is no wonder 1,500 Pastors daily on estimate leave the ministry. If Pastors can't address the things in our lives that fuel carnality and unrighteousness, then where does that leave the church? We have to be a body of believers willing to hear the truth regardless of whether it is socially or politically correct. Our main concern should be whether it is Biblically correct. Is this for my spiritual good? Is my lifestyle leading me to eternal life or eternal death? Pastors have a serious charge to provide us with truth, to mature us in righteousness, and to give account for our soul, if we have been placed in their flock.

The Apostle Paul and other apostles throughout the letters to the church (not unbelievers) addressed some of these very same issues: sexual immorality, reveling, unnatural affection, sobriety of the saints, filthy language & communication, and so forth. Yet, at a very critical time in world history, and indeed church history, it appears the church is still needing milk. We must go on to maturity, but we must be a church committed to holiness, righteousness,truth and purity, which by the way are required of all church regardless of denomination or non-denomination. God is coming back for the  Church, His Bride without spot and wrinkle, not a church that excuses or makes excuses for a stained garment.

I encourage you, as I was challenged by the Lord, to examine yourself and see if you are in the faith. I encourage Pastors to not back down from the hard issues, the "untouchables" and preach the unadulterated Word of God. We're counting on you!

Blessings, Peace, and Church Love